When I first found out we were pregnant, I expected life would change significantly. No more traveling, no more late nights at bars, and no more free time for ourselves. I believed that pregnancy, for me, would be a constant mish-mosh of trying to figure what to do in a situation with which I had no experience with. That, and running back and forth to the grocery store to pick up snacks for Jenn. But I was wrong and life pretty much continued as normal. The biggest stresses involved finding a new apartment, finding a doctor we liked, and figuring out the whole hospital thing in Manhattan (which I can tell you is much different from anywhere else in the country). The stresses have been minimal compared to the excitement, and I am overjoyed to meet CLL in a couple of weeks!
While you try to continue your normal life, however, your priorities begin to change. The feeling you get when you feel that first kick is unlike any other. I never thought that I’d prefer to talk to the baby instead of watching the football game – but it just happens. Getting a reaction from CLL when s/he hears your voice, is like a freaking MIRACLE. You feel like you just won the jackpot – and I guess, in a way, you have. Some things I’ve enjoyed over the past 9 months that I didn’t think would be that fun: 1) decorating the nursery, 2) buying awesome baby gear, and 3) learning about what actually happens to a woman when she’s pregnant – it doesn’t sound like fun but all the bio stuff is actually really interesting. I’ve also enjoyed documenting every minute of the experience with my camera (I think Jenn might be over me sticking the camera in her face but she’ll thank me later).
During the first half of the pregnancy, my biggest anxiety was related to the hospital experience. I particularly don’t like hospitals and get hyper-sensitive when I have to make decisions about things I have limited knowledge about. You want your partner to have the best experience possible, resulting in added pressure on you. I think hospital anxiety is only natural, but in this instance, given that it’s our first child, it felt amplified. However, with 2 weeks to go, I can confidently say that I am ready. Much of this has to do with all the research that Jenn has done. She has read every book and researched every blog. We’ve also hired a doula, which I was against at first given the cost but now can safely say it was the best decision we’ve made. And all the support we’ve gotten from our friends and family makes me feel confident that everything will be OK. Thank you everyone!
I can’t wait to meet CLL! I leave you with a quick history of the last 9 1/2 months – enjoy! -Maciej